Dice games
I was reading a post about beer pong a few minutes ago, and I remembered this shit ass drinking game we played in college. It was called boxhead, and it was a dice game (but it was also a box game). I can't remember all the rules, but there are a few things I do know. First, and painfully foremost, was the box in question. If you rolled an 11 or 12, you had to put the box on your head, and everyone HAD to refer to you as boxhead. We were adamant on this point. The box was about this big:
But the box didn't have any kittens in it. Holy shit, the game would be so much worse if it was called box-with-5-kittens-in-it-head. Oh god, the scratching, the mewling. But I digress.
When the box was on your head, you had to drink whenever anyone else had to drink, which was what every other roll of the dice made various other players do. Like circle of death, every roll had its own appropriate drinking command. But it wasn't bad enough that the boxhead had to drink at a near continuous pace - no - people took to slapping and hitting the boxhead, and throwing things at you, because in your tiny cardboard prison you were completely unaware of your surroundings, and thusly unable to defend yourself in any appreciable manner. You were only able to be freed of boxhead status when another player rolled an 11 or 12, and was forced into the box.
Once someone threw a baseball at me while I was the boxhead, and it was awful. Not threw as in nolan ryan wind up with your leg all hiked up and your hat pulled low kind of throw, but more of a relaxed overhand lob. However, not being able to dodge or react in any way to being struck by a baseball makes it oh so much worse, even when you are armed with some handy corrugated helmetry. I'm pretty sure the resulting violence put an end to my collegiate boxhead career. For the record, boxhead was a much more rewarding game than beer pong. Instead of competition and some level of rudimentary skill building to go along with your drinking, boxhead gave you a tiny dash of humiliation and a big ole' heaping slice of beat the shit out of that guy with a box on his head, which is delightfully cathartic.
But the box didn't have any kittens in it. Holy shit, the game would be so much worse if it was called box-with-5-kittens-in-it-head. Oh god, the scratching, the mewling. But I digress.
When the box was on your head, you had to drink whenever anyone else had to drink, which was what every other roll of the dice made various other players do. Like circle of death, every roll had its own appropriate drinking command. But it wasn't bad enough that the boxhead had to drink at a near continuous pace - no - people took to slapping and hitting the boxhead, and throwing things at you, because in your tiny cardboard prison you were completely unaware of your surroundings, and thusly unable to defend yourself in any appreciable manner. You were only able to be freed of boxhead status when another player rolled an 11 or 12, and was forced into the box.
Once someone threw a baseball at me while I was the boxhead, and it was awful. Not threw as in nolan ryan wind up with your leg all hiked up and your hat pulled low kind of throw, but more of a relaxed overhand lob. However, not being able to dodge or react in any way to being struck by a baseball makes it oh so much worse, even when you are armed with some handy corrugated helmetry. I'm pretty sure the resulting violence put an end to my collegiate boxhead career. For the record, boxhead was a much more rewarding game than beer pong. Instead of competition and some level of rudimentary skill building to go along with your drinking, boxhead gave you a tiny dash of humiliation and a big ole' heaping slice of beat the shit out of that guy with a box on his head, which is delightfully cathartic.
posted by Bluebeard at 10:19 PM
2 Comments:
God, I love this.
I was a little nervous for a second, seeing a box of sweet little kittens and then a reference to drinking games. For a moment I was worried that maybe you had to eat a kitten after so many tequila shots or something...
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